It is not perfectly straightened hair. Nor is it the must have mascara color, the shirt tied in the back so perfectly that the hair tie doesn’t show, the shortest shorts, or the right name brand of clothes. I wish every young girl, every girl, heck even 40 year old girls, could know the secret to beauty.
A confident, happy girl is a beautiful girl!
I wish girls were raised to know it and believe it and live it every day. Happiness is the best kind of beautiful; a beauty that can last through your lifetime. Happiness is within our control and is not dependent on how much money we have, how our bodies fit the current styles, which boy thinks we are cute, or what clothes we are wearing. Beauty is within us all. Save your daughter a lifetime of chasing beauty and show her exactly where to find it.
While it seems to be an uphill battle to make our young girls believe they are beautiful, there is a simple solution!
It turns out that happiness is absolutely contagious!
Researchers have come up with proof after proof that happiness can be learned. It can be shared and it can be passed on and on. So share your happiness with your daughter. Show her daily how you find happiness.
Step One! Smile everyday! Seems simple. But are you smiling every day? Do you share happy thoughts and reflections from your day? Do you see beauty in yourself and your life? Don’t ask her if your outfit looks OK. Don’t ask her if something is in style or if you look skinny in a certain pair of pants. Announce to her that you feel great today. Tell her you love these pants. Choose an outfit because you love it and be sure she knows how fantastic you feel today. Make statements about how you handled a situation really well. Tell her about how you rocked that phone call or impressed that customer. Smile at a simple gesture. Belly laugh and snort over a joke or a funny story. Let yourself experience happiness. The day is busy and chaotic and there a million things to be done before the day ends, but have you smiled today? Have you stopped, maybe at dinner, to smile and laugh with your daughter? Click here to read about time importance of sharing a family meal once in a while.
Next, put on some fun, happy music! Music has proven to affect mood. Happy music leads to more happiness. Make a playlist for yourself and plug it in to your car when your daughter is along for the ride. Your captive audience will have no choice but to listen. Play one of her tunes, one of yours? See if happy music affects your mood. If you have a few minutes with your daughter, look up the latest pop song or music video and show her your dance moves. Learn a new dance together. Laugh and listen to music! Have your daughter film a lip-sync to one of her favorite songs while you are driving her to practice for the 100th time this week. But make it a happy song.
Finally, teach your daughter to walk with her head held high. Show her that making eye contact with people around her allows her to connect with the world around. It is a hard habit to start but it shows the world you are confident and sure of whom you are. Building confidence starts with making it a habit. Believing in herself takes time. Fake it til you make it here! Walk with confidence. Smile with confidence. Teach your daughter to greet a person with eye contact and a smile. It sets an immediate tone of confidence. Be sure you are walking with your head help high and greeting people with eye contact and a tone of confidence. She is watching you and will learn to hold herself like you hold yourself.
Beauty is strength.
Beauty is humor.
Beauty is musical talent.
Beauty is passion.
Beauty is dreams.
Beauty is singing.
Beauty is kindness.
Beauty is attitude.
Beauty is wisdom.
Beauty is happiness.
Find your happiness and share it with the world! There is a girl out there watching!
Joy Hartman is passionate about empowering girls to become strong, confident women. She works with girls of all ages as a family therapist in Wisconsin and has the unique experience of raising two soon-to-be strong, confident teenage daughters of her own. For more fun and support on this crazy roller coaster ride of parenting teenagers, join Joy and hundreds of other parents at: Joyhartman.com or Facebook